Jubilee is a once-in-history celebration of a uniquely worthy British woman, and institution

Sixteen years ago I swore my allegiance to her Majesty the Queen as a new citizen of the United Kingdom, while retaining my passport from the United States. I saw no conflict. America’s government and institutions come in a direct line of descent from the UK, and I couldn’t imagine a time when the special relationship wouldn’t hold my two homes in bonds of amity. 

I also liked the queen. A great deal. 

My confidence wasn’t just rooted in my admiration for the extraordinary Elizabeth Windsor, about whom many millions of laudatory words will have been written on this, her Platinum Jubilee weekend. After living in England for more than a decade, I’d become a big fan of an a-political head of state. A person who embodied the nation, who worked

constantly in its service, but who hadn't climbed the greasy pole of politics and had no political opinions. (At least none we will ever hear about.) The more polarised politics has become in both of my home countries, the more I appreciate how this critical feature of the UK government stands apart.

I was horrified, therefore, when my nephew came to visit us while studying for his A levels in UK government and politics, to discover that the role of head of state, and the monarchy that fulfils it, were not covered in his course materials. "I won't be tested on it, so why should I bother?" he argued. No wonder that while polls consistently show majority support for the Queen and the institution, those numbers plummet amongst the 16 - 24 age group. 

Whilst I support his pragmatic methods for scoring well on his test, I did my best to argue my case for the British monarchy to a skeptical teenager. Feel free to disagree with the institution but, if you're going to take the republican point of view, then lay out your plan for how you'll replace our current system? Who will become patron of those hundreds of charities, and will they have the same power to attract volunteers and fund-raising? Ditto for the leadership of all those bits of the military. Who becomes the focal point of the honours system, and will their distribution of awards, and invitations to garden parties, evoke the same pride and exclusivity as when they come from a monarch? Who will go on all of those State visits to other countries, and host leaders here? We've benefitted from a royal team who (with a few aberrations quickly dealt with) impresses and gentles everyone from brutal dictators to self-obsessed populists, who can't be tied to whichever party is in power ... or the opposition ... and who can remain gracious and welcoming no matter what their personal feelings for the visitor. I need the replacement to do the same, please.

How about those regular sessions with the prime minister, perhaps the only time in his or her whole life when he or she can discuss problems, kick around ideas and just talk with no threat of leaking and no judgement. And get honest views on past administrations free of a political agenda. Who will chair the Commonwealth, perhaps the greatest accomplishment of the Queen's reign, and a union of nations that could be particularly influential as our world develops? 

We're not done yet; let's consider the PR value to the nation. You'll have to fund a massive increase in marketing to keep those tourism numbers above 40 million a year (pre-pandemic) when the magic of the British Royals, and the ceremonies around them, is what draws many here over other European destinations. And how about the overseas sales boosts that more than 500 British-made products get from their Royal Warrants? How many Insta influencers will we have to pay to replace that? Then there's that hard-to-measure HR and morale role, where the monarch and the royal family serve as the voice of the nation, leading the grieving in times of tragedy and the celebration in times of joy. Who will have the gravitas to take over that 3pm Christmas address that brings us together, for a few minutes, as one national family?

However you replace the Windsors, the new people who do the job ... who must be competent, charismatic, always pleasant, never complain and take on an average of 3.2 thousand official engagements a year, including a distressingly high amount of weekend and evening work ... can not be political. Not even a whiff of opinion on anything controversial can pass their lips. Because they must be a blank slate onto which all can project their hopes and ambitions. To ensure this, of course, whoever replaces the royals will have to give up their own rights to vote.

Your budget for building this new function, from the chief and his or her core assistants to all the support staff, all the travel they do and all their operating costs, is about £80 million a year. Of course, the operation currently runs at a profit, because George III swapped all the property the family owned ... the Crown Estates ... for a regular allowance. We, the taxpayer, pocket about £400 million a year off that deal after we fund the monarchy. One supposes if we relieve them of their job, we'll have to think about giving at least some of those estates back...

To be honest, few who were celebrating this weekend gave much of a thought to any of that. (This history fanatic is regularly distressed by how few modern Brits know the Crown Estates deal.) The Platinum Jubilee and its four-day weekend were an excuse for a good party. Even the most ardent anti-monarchists respect Elizabeth II and wouldn't deny her that. In what might have been a bit of monarchist karma, many of those who thought they'd skip the festivities and get out of the country were caught in disastrous airline delays and cancellations due to staffing issues. This was a weekend above all others to stay in the green and pleasant land.

Most of the world will have seen at least some of the magnificent four days of celebrations in London. I, like most of the country, came nowhere near those crowds. Our Jubilee was a gentler affair, but wherever you were, it was about community. Most houses sported bunting, neighbourhoods planned parties and people wore red, white and blue. I even got Jubilee nails.

In our bit of Hampshire the local council sponsored a scarecrow trail to encourage creativity and get people walking around. The photo below shows our community centre's efforts. Our playing fields became festival grounds for the Big Jubilee Lunch on Sunday, augmented by live music, bouncy castles and historical re-enactors hacking away at each other to the delight of the children.

Though our bunting was out in Hampshire, we spent the bulk of our weekend in Gloucestershire. If patriotic decorations liven up a modern estate, they enchant a Cotswold village. Stow-on-the-Wold was a cheerful blaze of bunting, ribbons, flags (including a fair few royal standards) and decorated shop windows. 

Friday saw us at the beacon lighting at the top of the gently sloping cricket pitch. Stow's was one of 3,500 lit simultaneously around the country. Given that I'd never attended a beacon lighting before, I was childishly excited. Given that my expectations had been set by the beacon lighting scene in The Lord of the Rings and of photos of Victorian beacons the size of three-story houses, I was disappointed. 

Health and Safety has no doubt been at work here. The beacon was a metal cage roughly the size and shape of a medium waste bin, soldered on top of a 6-foot pole and full of fire-starter-soaked logs. That was surrounded by a ring of fire buckets, then a rope barrier keeping us all at least 20 feet from the inferno. At least four officials in high viz vests stood by, ready to deal with any trouble. Unlikely in Stow, where merry makers had poured out of pub and garden parties, glass in hand, to raise a cheer in good natured solidarity.

The fireworks display that followed was more impressive. It was no urban blockbuster, but a satisfying few minutes of mostly red, white and blue bursts to the accompaniment of a few Queen tracks and the national anthem. Given the small village crowd, it had the merit of feeling like a private display. The best part of it all, however, was simply the setting. Stow-on-the-Wold sits at the highest point in the Cotswolds, 800 feet above sea level. The playing fields slope away to the west, revealing a pastoral wonderland of rolling hills and valleys (the wolds), verdant tree lines and lush fields, and frame an exquisite sunset. It must be one of the best views in England.

Local villages hosted other activities throughout the weekend, from special art exhibitions to themed dances to community lunches to decorating contests. At Sudeley Castle (which I wrote about in detail last year) they had a charming little display of coronation and modern "Elizabethan" memorabilia assembled from the owners and staff, plus several royal "sculptures" in the gardens made out of moss, leaves, flowers and other organic materials. Children could follow a special trail in search of one of the Queen's corgis.

Even though weather across most of the country turned gloomy by Saturday, people's spirits remained high. Brits are neither optimistic nor patriotic as a general rule. Only on special occasions do those qualities come to the fore, and royal jubilees make them particularly abundant. I wish we could capture and maintain that feeling, because given the ages of the monarch and her heirs it's going to be a very long time before we see another Jubilee in this country. 

However, on the 4th of June, 2024, Elizabeth will surpass Louis XIV to become the longest reigning monarch in world history. Yes, that's Louis XIV of Versailles-building, "l'etat c'est moi"-quipping fame whose descendants went to the guillotine in a flamboyant demonstration of how not to do monarchy. Beating the French is always sweet for the English. Beating that particular Frenchman with an example of how monarchy can actually add value in a modern democracy will be another excuse to party for the whole nation. Put it in your diary now, and let's do all we can to keep our beloved queen healthy, happy, and glorious for the next milestone.

Queen Elizabeth, sadly, did not make that last milestone, dying on 8 September 2022.